Worst RP Thread Ever

[Regina Mills]

This is....kind of like the Worst Fanfic Ever game, but a lot more contained. Instead, we're gonna do some really bad ROLEPLAYING. Toss in your characters, treat it as if it were a real rp thread...but make it intentionally BAD. Out of Character-ness, randomness, anything cliche/ridiculous/Mary Sue-ish/facepalm-enducing is WELCOME.

I'll start.

Regina was STILL very angry at Snow, in case anyone had forgotten. But she was also angry at everyone she'd ever met since coming to AM as well. Everyone from the people who had trolled her in the ICC to the randoms who kept showing up in Storybrooke. So she decided to do what she did best and curse them all to a world even worse than this one...

Narnia.

"Alakazam!" she shouted, as rainbow smoke enveloped everyone close by and took them to Narnia. and Meekz did not bother to ask any other roleplayer for their permission to do this to their characters. When Regina ended up in Narnia, she got up and brushed herself off. What is the first thing I should do here? she wondered to herself. Take over this new land before Rumpelstiltskin could? Find Snow and exact her revenge at last?

...That last thought sounded the most appealing. It was then that Regina realized that there was snow. All over the ground. Regina hated snow because it reminded her of Snow.

She began to set things on fire.

[Loki Laufeyson]

Loki was in Narnia and he was sad because Thor was still better than him and Odin did not love him. He shed a single, perfect tear that plummeted to the ground and turned into a sad face in the snow or some shit.

And then he saw Regina lighting things on fire. His sad face tear floated up and doused all the fire because Loki wanted to conquer Narniagard for himself and he didn't want all his shit to be on fire ovah hurrrr.

And then Loki said. "hi regina i love the new dress" as if he had completely forgotten the fact that he ruined her evil plans. Suddenly, Ymir the frost giant walked in and handed Loki a single rose.

[Regina Mills]

Water. Her fire had been defeated by...water. What?! Where had that come from? It wasn't exactly like she was surrounded by frozen water on the ground, or anything. Regina felt a familiar, burning rage at having her plans foiled. Whoever was responsible would pay dearly for their interference. She turned around, prepared to magically turn them into a toad....or possibly something even more unpleasant.

That was when Loki complimented her dress, and Regina completely forgot why she was angry. A rarely known fact about Regina was that if you complimented her, she forgave you instantly. However, as she saw the frost giant hand Loki the rose, she suddenly grew very sad. The rose reminded her of Belle and Rumpelstiltskin. And that reminded her that Rumpelstiltskin had gotten his happy ending, while she had not.

"Loki, what is the meaning of life?" Regina sighed, looking out mournfully into the distance. Then, for no particular reason, she waved her hand and turned Loki's rose into Gaston.

[Once-ler]

It wasn't long before Once-ler suddenly dropped in, literally dropping in through a tree before hitting the ground. He suspected this was Maleficent's work, due to the lack of pants on his legs. She'd stolen them again, the scoundrel! He sat up, brushing off his bunny-print boxers as he eyed Regina and Loki. Who were they? Hadn't he seen them before in the mysterious place of "ICC"?

Though he was far more concerned about the flames that were jumping around as Loki worked on putting them out....especially when some reached the trees. A squeak came from the tall male as he attempted to use Greed-ler's jacket to put out the flames. "Ahhh what are you doinnnnnggg?!!11 You'll piss off the Lorax of this world!"

Of course at the same time inside of Oncie's head, Greed-ler was crying like a wee baby over the loss of his glorious jacket while Innocent whacked him with a pool noodle that an imaginary Bar-Ba-Loot gave him.

[adachi]

"I'd not worry about that. I already had him roasted."

[/b] called a strange and usual man, who was mostly strange and unusual because he was the only person in the room without an outrageous outfit. Tohru Adachi was hoping to chow down on the Lorax, who he had roasted over Regina's flames earlier this week, because his budget never really let him eat meat. However, when he was roasting his barbequed Lorax, the police took away half of it as evidence to a 'murder' or something. Whatever. Adachi blamed the trees. Fuckin' trees. If the trees weren't there, then the Lorax wouldn't have been running around all day like an idiot, and then the police wouldn't have cared if he ate him. Trees.

"Trees are nothing but Birches and Firs."[/b][/color] Damn birches. Damn firs! Ugh. They pissed Adachi off. Absentmindedly, he stuffed a cabbage into his mouth and starting chewing, because he had no gum and now Lorax to eat. Adachi hated being hungry![/size][/center]

[crane]

AND THEN CRANE STEPPED IN holding his magical device. The device released all of the woes and sadness in the world out into the galaxy because Crane was feeling EVIL that day.

And then he blew his nose and used the tissue to create a temporal paradox which means some sciency shit that I didn't research so I'm going to say it opened a portal to the dimension of Crane having a machete. And then Crane had a machete!

He used it to destroy nature and then he killed everyone's chars without me asking permission because I'm still lazy. Crane then ate Earth and learned that Batman is Bruce Wayne.